This story was short and surprisingly coherent. Let’s dive in, shall we?
There was once a young man who enlisted in the king’s army, due to his poverty. Let’s call him Leo. Leo’s bravery in combat was the decisive factor in winning a battle, so the king promoted him to “the first in the kingdom”. Wait, wouldn’t that be the king? I’m confused. In any case, the story goes on to say that ”the king had a daughter who was very beautiful, but also very strange”. Judging by how messed up the children of rich and famous people tend to be, I’m not surprised in the slightest. Anyway, the princess wanted to get married, but only on the condition that the spouse be buried alive with her if she dies. After all, “if he loves me with all his heart, of what use will life be to him afterwards?”. This might seem crazy, but to be fair, the princess offered to do the same in return, so at least she’s consistently crazy. However, if these are the expectations woman have of men then it’s no wonder men are afraid of commitment. Indeed, the until-death-take-us-both vow “frightened away all wooers”, except Leo who asked for her hand in marriage. At that point, even the king said “dude, are you sure?”. OK, that’s not a direct quote, but it’s not far off. Even so, Leo’s love was unwavering, so they married.
Sometime later, the princess fell ill and died. She was buried in the royal vault with Leo by her side. He was given four candles, four loaves of bread and four bottles of wine for his last supper, then the door was sealed shut. Why four of each? I have no idea, since it was of no relevance to the story what so ever. I think we need to get used to that. After a while, a snake crawled into the vault through a crack in the corner. Leo was determined to protect his corpse bride and cut the snake in three with his sword. Then, a second snake came out carrying three leaves in its mouth. It placed the leaves on the dead snake, which immediately was healed and resurrected. Leo realized the potential of these leaves and covered his wife’s mouth and both her eyes with the leaves and, lo and behold, she came back to life. They called out for the guards, who let them out. Leo made sure to save the leaves and gave them to his trusted servant, explaining how to use them in case of an emergency.
All seemed well for a time, but Leo began to notice that his wife no longer harbored the same love for him as before. Having died would make anyone grumpy, I suppose, but you’d think being resurrected would make up for it. Leo thought perhaps a vacation would improve the situation and invited her on a voyage to visit his old father across the sea. Unfortunately, the princess “conceived a wicked inclination for the skipper” on the ship. I never realized the rugged sailor stereotype was that powerful. If so, I would have considered a navy career. Either way, she and the skipper conspired to kill Leo in his sleep and managed to toss him overboard during the night. They could then claim that he had fallen by accident, and marry without any suspicion. Thankfully, however, Leo’s servant witnessed the deed whilst in hiding, and took a small sailing boat to recover Leo’s corpse. He resurrected Leo with the leaves and they quickly set sail to get back to the kingdom before the princess. Once they arrived, they told the king about what had transpired and then hid in a secret chamber to prepare for the big reveal, which kind of seems like an episode of Jerry Springer at this point. Anyhow, when the “godless woman” appeared with the skipper and lied about what had happened, Leo revealed himself and the king sentenced her to be drowned to death in a ship full of holes. Jerry! Jerry! Jerry! The end.
For once, I wasn’t completely baffled by the plot, so either the brothers Grimm were making progress or I am. I think the reason the story was easier to follow this time is mainly because it was only three pages short. But also because the moral is quite clear: keep your vows and be faithful, don’t murder anyone and don’t lie about it. And for my final thought, if even the parents are trying to talk you out of marrying their daughter, then perhaps you should take their advice.
Sorobetea 